The Mother Ship

I was going to write a Mother’s Day piece talking about fun gifts to get for mom this year, but I had a change of heart. Instead I’d just like to take a moment to talk about motherhood in general.

I was thinking of my own mom, and the relationship that we have. I was thinking of my own experience as a mom, but also thinking of all of the other moms in all of their beautiful variety.

Motherhood is a weird thing. I think it’s one of the rare skills where no one ever gets better. Think about it. If you took 4 years of tennis lessons, it stands to reason that you would improve your tennis skills. But in the trenches of the training and execution of motherhood, the sport keeps changing! Example: Just when you’ve got your 3 year old down, he turns 4 and becomes a wholly different alien creature. (Don’t get me started about teens and tweens….bartender!)

Another thing that I find weird and kind of mind blowing about motherhood is that even if you never have a relationship with your mom, ever in your whole life, she is still your mother….until the end of time. It is a biological title that no one can erase. (I always loved reminding my kids of that fact, especially when they were little.)

Society has gone to war over stay-at-home moms versus working moms. Each side coming with it’s own heaping helping of guilt. Awesome! And who can’t help poking fun and labeling soccer moms, helicopter moms and the ever “popular” mom jeans? (I have a secret fear of “mom hair”. Ask my stylist. Yikes!)

Despite the labels (and the jeans), there is an awesome and simple beauty of being a mom. And to clarify the distinction, a mother = biological, and a mom = The love part. Moms come in every shape, size, age and gender. There are old-school moms that are textbook womb to tomb. There are grandmothers who have raised grandchildren and have filled that mom role. And let’s not forget all of the single daddies out there pulling double duty and giving their all to make heads or tails of nail polish, prom dresses, and feminine products because of a missing lady of the house.

I’ve witnessed (and probably been aaalllll of the following) good moms, bad moms, mediocre moms, super moms, tired moms, happy moms, overwhelmed moms and outstanding moms who were blessed with children who are not easy. I have seen mothers spend every waking moment bedside in an ICU and I’ve seen mom warriors taking to the streets to fight for the rights and dignity of their babies.

Despite where you land in the immense field of mommy wild flowers, I wish you a happy mother’s day. I challenge you to thank your mom for something today. Think about something that you have learned from her and thank her for that, even if she has moved on from this world. If you don’t have a good relationship with your mom, thank her (via the universe) for giving you life or even for teaching you what kind of mother you DON’T want to be.   Also kinda important, no?

The most valuable lesson that my own mom taught me? Everyone you look at, everyone you see; that person is someone’s baby. Someone loves that person more than anybody else in the whole world. Just imagining that softens my heart and feelings toward others. It makes that person important and it makes me consider each person; really consider them, because I know what it’s like to be loved that much and I know what it’s like to love that much. Thanks mom! And Happy Mother’s Day to all.

A big thank you for all of the friends and family who shared their beautiful pictures with me.